Author Topic: On Line Dating HELP!!!!  (Read 6839 times)

Offline Paula

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On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« on: Apr 12 2011, 10:14 PM »
Hi friends

Advice needed please. I have now been on my own for 2 years and I'm going to give on line dating a go as I can't be bothered to dress up and go out (also a bit scared to with MD). 

My question is, I am completing an on line profile so should I put in the fact that I suffer with MD or not?  :-\   

Part of me says no because it will freighten them off and it's none of their business and wait until I see if I like them and part of me says yes because then if they reply then they know what they are getting into and I will feel like a fraud if I go out with anybody with my 'secret'.!   :-\

Very difficult one for me this as I always like to be honest and up front. God I wish I could live a normal bloody life, if it's not hard enough as it is.


Paula xx

Offline Dizzybee

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #1 on: Apr 13 2011, 10:00 AM »
Hi Paula
If you say you have MD you might meet someone who has it too and then you could support each other. If it was me I would be up front because you might like him and then when you tell him he might run a mile. Just a thought. :)
Dizzybee

Offline Christina

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #2 on: Apr 13 2011, 11:51 AM »
Tricky! Think I might keep it quiet and wait to see how things go but tell the person fairly early on before you got too involved and to keep it honest. No right or wrong way to do it, just do what feels ok for you. Best of luck  ;)
not waiting for the storm to pass, but learning to dance in the rain ...

NEWOSA65

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #3 on: Apr 13 2011, 12:13 PM »
Hi Paula - if you have blonde hair, you could describe yourself as a dizzy blonde? hehe!  S :-) xx

Offline Emma

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #4 on: Apr 13 2011, 01:00 PM »
OOOOOOOOOOOOO I might well suggest say it then it is out there and you are not getting yourself stressed and worried about telling them with the potential of bringing on an attack due to the stress...
And I am a blonde...my mother told me off for calling myself a dizzy blonde though haha
Emma x
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Offline Paula

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #5 on: Aug 18 2011, 12:38 PM »
Wish me luck friends as I have a date on Sunday with a guy I met on dating website and he only lives up the road from me.  ;)

Paula xx

Offline Emma

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #6 on: Aug 18 2011, 01:57 PM »
Good luck Paula, Keep us updated!!!
Em xxx
Be happy - Keep smiling :-D

Offline bt1307

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #7 on: Aug 18 2011, 02:55 PM »
Ah good luck!! I did on line dating when I was by myself. Never met up with anyone though I was always too nervous lol

Offline Paula

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #8 on: Aug 18 2011, 03:12 PM »
Thanks girls

I must admit bt I'm starting to think about excuses already and I only made the arrangement last night!  You have the confidence knocked out of you when someone walks out but then it's made even worse by the fact that you now have MD and I think that was the reason he left.

I will probably not go, and end up some sad old woman with kids that have left her (and they're boys so want give a monkeys), that will take up knitting and stink of piss because she's gone mad with boredom!  ;D

Paula xx

Offline SJ

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #9 on: Aug 18 2011, 03:32 PM »
No Paula that will NOT happen  :D

You go girl...I know it must be so nerve racking but hey you may have MD but from speaking to you on here I know you are a lovely person and some lucky fella out there will be telling you that soon.....and this one may be him!! Don't let him go without a chance I say  ;D

Good luck and let us know how you get on  ;)

SJx

Offline Elaine

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #10 on: Aug 18 2011, 04:58 PM »
Have fun ! My best friend just ventured into the world of online dating and after numerous dates and a few goes at speed dating she's madly in love again  :)
Elaine xx

Offline bt1307

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #11 on: Aug 19 2011, 09:26 PM »
Ha ha, that is exactly how I felt!! I arranged one date and the whole day I was fretting, will he be a  murderer, will we have anything to talk about, then an hour before he text to stand me up! It was a mixture of feeling relieved and a bit insulted at the same time lol

Even though I never met up with anyone it really boosted my confidence to come home from work to messages, it's hard to pick yourself back up after a break up, I really struggled when I suddenly found myself a single mum. Sometimes we spend so long trying to think of the reasons why things have gone wrong, but I truly believe that most of the time it's just because people weren't "right" together, and if he was prepared to walk out just because your unwell, then he's not worth your energy.

Keep your chin up, and I do hope you go on your date, the right persons out there, sometimes under our noses all along (as was the case with me) we just need to take a few risks

Jo xxx

Offline Paula

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #12 on: Aug 20 2011, 06:10 PM »
Oh god I'm scared!!  Bloody stupid at my age, I know it's only coffee but................ deep breaths!!!

Paula xx

Offline Lindsey

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #13 on: Aug 20 2011, 09:58 PM »
Go for it Paula, you've got nothing to lose and possibly a lot to gain.  If you meet the right person for you with his heart in the right place it shouldn't make any difference that you have MD. 
I had absolutely no luck with meeting a decent guy over here in NZ.  I came back to live in the UK for a couple of years in my early 20's, firstly staying in Leeds with my grandparents, then ended up meeting my future partner in a little country pub in the Peak District of all places!  Have since dragged him back over to live in NZ with me - but we do miss our family back home.

Offline Emma

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #14 on: Aug 21 2011, 02:22 AM »
So Paula when is the night or day. Good luck and hope he is lovely :) xx
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Offline Paula

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #15 on: Aug 21 2011, 08:06 AM »
Hi Em

It's 11 o'clock today!!!!  Not slept well but ear seems ok thank god, will let you know how it goes as long as I don't wimp out at the last minute.

Paula xx

Offline Emma

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #16 on: Aug 21 2011, 08:46 AM »
Good luck. Go enjoy and have an amazing time. And if you don't like him you can say you gave it a try. Or you could meet the man of your dreams :D have fun xxxx
Be happy - Keep smiling :-D

Offline SJ

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #17 on: Aug 21 2011, 11:39 AM »
ooooo Paula! I really hope it's going well ;)

Look forward to hearing all about it!!  ;D

SJx

Offline Paula

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #18 on: Aug 21 2011, 03:03 PM »
Well I did it, I went and we both turned up at exactly the same time, fate I thought!

He was a really nice guy, about 6 foot 8 (I'm 5.3!  :o) he bought coffee and we talked a lot (well I did, need to  :-X sometimes) and laughed a lot.

I didn't get the old butterflies but I think that's me being cautious but we have exchanged numbers and yes I will be seeing him again.  No mention of MD though and I feel a bit of a fraud!  :(

Hope you are all well today and thank you soooooo much for the encouraging words.

Paula xx

Offline Emma

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #19 on: Aug 21 2011, 03:09 PM »
YAY I am soo glad you went and that he was nice!!

 :flowers: :goodstuff: :dance: :clap: :dance2: :banana:
Be happy - Keep smiling :-D

Offline chrissieg

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #20 on: Aug 21 2011, 03:13 PM »
Great stuff Paula. hope that gives you a lift and something to look forward to.My daughter is going to USA for 12 months in 2 weeks time and I remember how awful it was for you last year similarly-I'm dreading it!
Chrissie
Chrissieg

Offline Paula

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #21 on: Aug 21 2011, 03:21 PM »
Chrissie my heart goes out to you my love honest it does, it's like they take your heart with them.  With me it brought on the worst MD attacks that I had ever had so please try and not let it get a grip of you.  He was due home in June but sent me an email a week before he was due to say he was staying on until September, I was devastated.  However he is hopefully coming home in 3 weeks today.

I promise you the time goes really quick but it wont seem like that now and at least with girls you got a better chance of them keeping in touch, I have to find out how mine is from a girl at work whose daughter is a friend of his on facebook!  Little monkey.

I will be thinking of you but please feel free to PM me if you ever need to chat because I soooo understand.

Paula xx

Offline chrissieg

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #22 on: Aug 21 2011, 05:10 PM »
Thanks a lot Paula- yes im trying to be very good and not get worked up any sooner than I need to in case it has MD consequences and missing her plus horrendous symptoms would be dreadful.I'll try to limit myself to a good cry on the day!We,re going to the Edinburgh festival and Northumberland for a week on Friday so some quality time together before she leaves
Thanks for words again
Chrissie
Chrissieg

Offline SJ

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #23 on: Aug 21 2011, 05:43 PM »
Wooohooo  :D ;D

Fab Paula you did it - well done you! Hope you enjoy your future meetings too x

Chrisseie - have a fab time with your daughter sounds great x

SJx

Offline Paula

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #24 on: Aug 25 2011, 06:04 PM »
HI friends

Date 2 tomorrow and this time I'm really looking forward to it, going for drinks so, knowing me, will probably disgrace myself completely and that will be the end of that but at least I would of had a good time - bring it on!   ;D :D :banana: :dance2: :dance:

Paula xx

Offline bt1307

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #25 on: Aug 25 2011, 06:47 PM »
Well done, sounds fab. Let us know the next installment.......

Offline Elaine

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #26 on: Aug 25 2011, 07:19 PM »
Great news ! So glad you had a good time  :)
Elaine xx

Offline SJ

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #27 on: Aug 25 2011, 09:23 PM »
 :clap: :dance: :goodstuff: :dance2: :D ;D

You go girl!!!....hope you have a great time....keep us posted hun  8)

SJx

Offline jeannette

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #28 on: Aug 26 2011, 12:01 AM »
I've only just seen this thread, and I just want to add my positive wishes, Paula.   The main thing - in my personal opinion - was that you both laughed during the first date, and isn't that the best thing?   And wow that your MD wasn't obvious, so it's up to you when to mention it.   (My balance, jerking and, of course, my stick, would be a bit of a giveaway!)   Hope your second date went really well - and if by chance not, at least you're out there, trying.  Fantastic.
Love, Jeannette

Offline amezcua

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Re: On Line Dating HELP!!!!
« Reply #29 on: Nov 15 2011, 03:56 PM »
If you tell him you have MD and he says "I wasn`t clever enough to go to University myself " that`s ok. You`ve told him. Carry on. No court in the world would convict you.